The obsession with knowing where everyone lives….

In Australia, if you were to ask someone you just met where they live (I’m not talking what suburb, I’m talking geographic coordinates) they would think you were a creep and perhaps even report you to the local authorities.

Here, “where do you live?” is just about the first question people ask me.

I tried to play dumb about not knowing all the names of places and being a little bit vague to try and gloss over the question. But I’ve found that there is generally some well-meaning Papua New Guinean within earshot who tries to ‘help’ the poor foreigner out by saying my exact address. All of my “Ummm, ahhhh, I don’t know the name, we’re about to move anyway, it’s next to that place where those other people live” are interrupted with a ‘helpful’ “she lives at ***** Lodge, Unit 20.” Face palm.

People aren’t satisfied with a simple I live in this suburb, or I live at this guest house. No, they want exactly what residence, how much rent you pay for said residence and what your cooking facilities are like.

The below is a fairly standard type of conversation for me, but I certainly had a bit of a giggle at this. My boss was asking me about a friend of mine, this is how the conversation went:

“Your friend, where does he live?”

“Middle Town”

“Middle Town? Where in Middle Town?”

“Not sure”

Then with an extremely serious tone in his voice, he ACTUALLY said this, no joke:

“We must trace him”